So when you praise or encourage your child’s behaviour and then reward it, the behaviour is more likely to happen again. Best Sentences to Praise Your Students. You can praise children of different ages for different things. They’re also more likely to keep trying and to be optimistic when they face challenges. My three-year-old granddaughter has (at present) delays, but she loves to try hard, practice new skills, and do things for herself. Be specific. C'mere. Writing Prompts and Comments. Using descriptive praise with your child takes more effort, skill and attention than using evaluative praise. Offering descriptive praise shows that you are paying close attention. Stevie Wilson is a Licensed Professional Counselor who specializes in working with children and families. It’s also more genuine than non-specific praise like ‘You’re a good boy’. Jackson. It s not a horrible thing to say, but it focuses on the parent taking ownership and it is more extrinsic. Overdoing a Good Thing. Faber, A. and Mazlish, E. (2012) How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk. You can also use encouragement before your child does something. If your praise is exaggerated, your child might not believe it. The colors you chose are so lifelike. These children tend to have less stable self-esteem 17 . You’re using your inside voice. It sure is Margaret! It must be based on observation of the child in different environments and engaging in different activities. Thank you. Descriptive praise builds a child’s self-esteem with two parts, the first is that the parent describes what the child has done. " I can see that you enjoy math. I can see you’ve already written one sentence and it starts with a capital letter and there’s a full stop at the end. A thumbs up, smile or high five can be powerful ways to show your child you’re impressed by their behaviour or efforts. "Hey. Children are programmed to seek their parent’s attention so why not focus on what they are doing right. Below are examples of what praising for the effort rather than the accomplishment sounds like. That way I can clearly see where your sentence begins and ends. For example, ‘I like the way you’ve found a spot for everything in your room’. 5-7 year olds: Adding on a number line 12, Co-construction of success criteria 5-6 year olds: Fractions - halving 80, A child’s mistake is celebrated at the visualizer for all to learn from 5-6 year olds: Counting in 2s,5s,10s 91, Teacher on the move feedback, challenging every child 5-6 year olds: Subtraction 2 digits The situation: For the first time, your child gets an A+ on a math test. 101 Phrases of Praise for Students That’s Incredible How Extraordinary! I especially like the way you lined the shoes up neatly together. I can jump up to the sky!” you say “You’re right, you are jumping so high!” instead of “good job!”. Rene Hackney: Some examples of each types of praise would be let us say your child plays a piano song, they have practiced all week and they play you this lovely tune. I think you’ll be great in the tryouts!’. Praise such as, “you’re so wonderful … perfect … great” can be too much for anyone to take, especially children. But look for the times when your child is behaving in positive ways, and praise your child’s behaviour. It could be a treat, a surprise or an extra privilege. © 2006-2021 Raising Children Network (Australia) Limited. Your Project Is First Rate! For example: "I noticed how you took time to show the new student around the school. Be careful about praising kids for achievements that come easily. You might praise a younger child for sharing or for leaving the park when asked. Descriptive Praise is very specific and thus is the most powerful motivator and training tool. The younger the student, the more immediate the praise should be. Suggestions to Make Praise More Descriptive . Make sure your child is paying attention! Many people react negatively to praise because we don’t notice that the comment is positive, we notice that it is a judgment. Studies show this kind of praise boosts confidence, so that kids treat challenges with excitement instead of fear. You’re Special Excellent! It is about noticing and mentioning all the OK things your child is doing to reinforce the behaviour you want to see. Children are more likely to repeat behaviour that earns praise or encouragement. Warning: This website and the information it contains is not intended as a substitute for professional consultation with a qualified practitioner. Your child needs to listen to your voice, see your facial expression, or look at your signs. Educators have long been trying to identify the best ways to praise students and influence behavior. Remember descriptive praise has two parts: Name three things your child does that you might want to praise. Use praise and rewards in age-appropriate ways. Rewards can make praise and encouragement work better. The flavors in your salad were so crisp and fresh. For example, if your 2-year-old is determined to put on her own socks but can't quite do it, say something like, "You're trying so hard to be a big girl and get those socks on. When praise is focused on effort, children are more likely to see trying hard as a good thing in itself. For example, as a reward for keeping their room tidy, you might let your child choose what’s for dinner. The short version is that descriptive praise, well “describes” what your child has done rather than evaluating the action. I am sure she appreciated the help." This will help your child develop a sense of pride and self-confidence. ‘Descriptive Praise’ is a way of giving your child appreciation and approval every day so that they are more motivated to listen and willing to co-operate. For example: "You sorted out your clothes and all your things so that you can easily access them anytime. I am sure she appreciated the help." Nevertheless, I emphatically believe that you should indeed praise your young child! Try: “Thank you for helping me tidy up. If you need to use them a lot, it might help to rethink the situation. (“I know how to plan ahead and be responsible.”) Descriptive praise does not foster a constant need to seek approval from others like evaluative praise. I can’t!” A four-year-old proudly sets the table “all by myself,” only to fall apart when a glass of water tips over. Acknowledge a child's effort or progress without judgment using clear, specific language. Descriptive praise is telling children exactly what you like about their behaviour. For example, ‘Thanks for picking up the toys – let’s go to the park to celebrate’. It may even become something he dislikes. Descriptive praise describes behavior and gives it a label. By using praise, you’re showing your child how to think and talk positively about themselves. Try to make your praise appropriate to the behaviour. New York: Scribner. The first step is to watch for times when your child behaves in positive ways, or makes an effort. For example, "You have been trying so hard to learn those new words and now you are able to read the whole story!" Younger children: You’ve been working for five minutes on your own and I haven’t heard any silly noises. Your child will feel good, and focusing on positive things will help you feel good too. In making praise effective, a teacher should explicitly note the behavior as the reason for praise in as timely a manner as possible. Describe what your child does. For example, when your child helps you carry a heavy load of groceries, instead of saying “You’re so strong!” try descriptive praise with, “Thank you for your help with that heavy load.”. Pixabay. Advertisement. Jun 3, 2019 - Explore Jess Mcwreath's board "Kids praise ideas/activities" on Pinterest. Here are some other examples of specific, descriptive praise: "Excellent prediction, Farrah. Help your child recognise when they’ve done well and encourage good behaviour with these tips: For more ideas and strategies, you might like to read our articles on encouraging good behaviour in children and encouraging good behaviour in teenagers. Generally, we try to encourage good behavior by using lots of superlatives: “Great job”, “Wow”, “Awesome”, “Way to go!” It seems like a natural thing to do, but the problem is that superlative praise is so vague that the child is unclear about what they actually did that was so great. For example, This website is certified by Health On the Net Foundation (HON) and complies with the HONcode standard for trustworthy health information. Comments should not be comparative, judgemental or conclusive. Praise your child for their strengths and encourage your child to feel excited about their own interests. Many of our own parents used evaluative praise with us as children so it’s second nature to pass this along in our parenting. Descriptive praise builds the child’s self-esteem and fosters looking within themselves for approval. For example, “I see you are ready to go to school, you have your coat on and you even put your toys away.” Second, after hearing what she has done, the child praises herself. Conditional praise also acts as an extrinsic motivation and reduces kids’ intrinsic motivation 16 . Raising Children Network is supported by the Australian Government. For example, ‘I love the way you shared your Lego with your brother just now’. All rights reserved. You can praise a teenage child for coming home at an agreed time, or for starting homework without being reminded. Look for nonverbal ways to praise or encourage your child. (“I know how to plan ahead and be responsible.”) Descriptive praise does not foster a constant need to seek approval from others like evaluative praise. Educators writing the report, the comments need to be descriptive. Firstly, by offering your teenager a description of what you observe, your teenager will very naturally come to heap praise upon themselves. Sitting on a park bench while my son played in the sandbox, I watched a preschooler whoosh down the slide on his belly, head first. Meltdown and Tantrum Prevention Checklist. The folks who research on praise would like parents and teachers to use descriptive praise and avoid evaluative praise when commenting on children’s behaviors, academics and athletics. Instead of: “Good job!" For example: Move into your baby's field of vision. What to Say and Why: Descriptive Praise . At the high school level, most students can accept delayed praise. Surprise your child with a reward for good behaviour. Far Out! Yes, it’s hard to get in the habit of using it. Are there any other strategies that you could try to encourage the behaviour you want? Wonderful! Descriptive praise … Reply ↓ Tanya (Post author) May 9, 2018 at 9:07 am. See whether you can give your child some words of encouragement every day. For example, “I see you are ready to go to school, you have your coat on and you even put your toys away.” Second, after hearing what she has done, the child praises herself. Many parents with good intentions use evaluative praise with their children without recognizing it. Westermann breaks down the structure of descriptive praise in the following way: 1) The call to praise 2) Reason for praise 3) Description of God's majesty a) in creation b) in history 4) Description of God's goodness a) God saves b) God preserves life 5) C oncluding call to praise 1) The call to praise: These psalms ordinarily begin with an imperative call to praise God. "I can see that you enjoy math. Praise is when you tell your child that you like what they’re doing or how they’re behaving – for example, ‘Great job, Riley’, ‘Well done, Jo’ or ‘That’s awesome, AB’. Use descriptive praise that conveys realistic, attainable standards. This helps your child understand exactly what it is that they’ve done well. They have enough confidence to say to themselves, "I'm happy with what I have done." “Thank you for setting the table tonight. I really like that. Descriptive Praise: I like the details you used in your picture. Once again, praise rewards results. Examples: Look for little changes and successes. For example, teenagers might not want to be praised publicly for their efforts, whereas toddlers might love being singled out for praise. It can work well for children of all ages, including teenagers. Now you’ll know right where to find them next time.” Show appreciation. Why We Lose Control and How to Prevent It, The Institute of Child Development at Texas Christian University, Dr. Karyn Purvis and Dr. David Cross, Dr. Daniel Siegel, Interpersonal Neurobiology, General rather than specific, usually delivered with exclamation, The child knows that the parent is giving this specific praise because the parent loves the child rather than appreciating the specifics of what the child has done, The child does not tend to believe the parent when parent uses evaluative praise, It can make the child feel worse or that they could have done better, It does not increase the child’s confidence, development, self-reliance or cooperation, It can foster perfectionism i.e., the child desires to do things perfectly in order to gain the approval of others, Is delivered in a calm, casual voice rather than as an exclamation, Is about noticing and describing the things that the child does (you can think of it like a sportscaster – stating what the child is doing but offering no evaluations), Is about noticing process rather than product i.e., effort rather than outcome, Strengthens the parent-child relationship because the parent is more aware of the child’s effort, Is the most powerful motivator and training tool, Increases child’s ability to accept disappointment, Increased child’s self-esteem, cooperation, and development of social/emotional skills. Outstanding Performance Marvelous I Can’t Get Over It! Descriptive praise is harder and takes longer, but the payoff is usually greater. This means you can use praise and encouragement to change difficult behaviour and replace it with desirable behaviour. And new research is helping teachers understand which types of praise are most meaningful to students and, more importantly, most likely to increase motivation. Descriptive Praise for Homework . The book below is excellent if you’d like more in-depth information.). This helps your child understand exactly what it is that they’ve done well. A three-year-old dressed in a superhero cape collapses in a corner and yells, “I can’t put on my shoes! Encouragement is praise for effort – for example, ‘You worked hard on that maths homework – well done’. Rather than waiting until your child has done something perfectly to give a compliment, try to praise any effort or improvement. Descriptive praise is an excellent motivator and is best for boosting self-esteem and reinforcing positive behaviour – when children get praise for behaving well, they’re … “You put all the trucks on the shelves where they belong. It is the best way to prevent problems because children want parents’ approval. For example, the praise, “Good job! No matter how it turns out, you’ve done your best’. I appreciate that you didn’t interrupt while I was giving my Montessori lesson. Praising effort can motivate your child and encourage them to try hard in the future. When you see this, immediately get your child’s attention and tell your child exactly what you liked – for example, ‘Noor, I liked how you waited your turn to play with that toy. Your child needs to connect your praise to the behavior. Now I have more time to read … What is Play Therapy and How Can it Help? A reward is a consequence of good behaviour. That will make a really big difference when we're trying to find our shoes in the morning," Being specific is one of the keys to more effective praise. Name exactly what the child did and how it helps you. Children face situations regularly with which they have no experience dealing and words of praise go a long way. You had to be listening closely to be so detailed in describing what you thought might happen next." As a guide, try to praise your child five times for every one time you say something negative. Of course, recognizing our children’s positive behavior is more likely to build self-esteem than dwelling on problems but praise is not always uplifting. It’s best not to overuse rewards. See more ideas about sunday school lessons, bible for kids, children's ministry. Great! That was a heavy load. This means when you’re 4-year-old says “Look at me! When a teacher sees a student is making progress, the language of encouragement as praise can be effective. During her years as a teacher and mother, Ms. Meyers discovered that not all praise was equal and some kinds were even deleterious to kids. Member organisations are the Parenting Research Centre and the Murdoch Childrens Research Institute with The Royal Children’s Hospital Centre for Community Child Health. The small things you say can build up over time to have a big effect on your child. Unbelievable Work You Should Be Proud Phenomenal! Kids need words of praise. You can praise a teenage child for coming home at an agreed time, or for starting homework without being reminded. Descriptive Praise is different from “evaluative praise.” Evaluative is vague and for that reason, it does not shape behavior. Way to Go! Try these 10 motivating phrases to praise your child's efforts and achievements: 1. No problem with forgetting to praise her or overpraising her–she does it herself, saying “Yay, Ellie!” when she accomplishes something. Think about the behaviors you are encouraging and the language that naturally accompanies them. That's what I call organization" By employing descriptive praise in your parent teenager relationship, there are at least two major benefits. It’s also more genuine than non-specific praise like ‘You’re a good boy’. It is also worth noting that the negative impact of controlling praises is bigger on girls than on boys 18 . Praise nurtures your child’s confidence and sense of self. Evaluative, what we are trying to steer clear off would be, What a pretty song. For example, ‘I like the way you’ve found a spot for everything in your room’. You’ve Got It Superb! (P.S. Descriptive praise builds a child’s self-esteem with two parts, the first is that the parent describes what the child has done. You have worked on these problems for over half an hour!" Cool! It’s a way of saying ‘Well done’ after your child has done something good or behaved well. You’re helping your child learn how to recognise when they do well and feel proud of themselves. Descriptive praise is when you tell your child exactly what it is that you like and is a very effective tool for giving information in a way that children are able to receive it. Descriptive praise is when you tell your child exactly what it is that you like. Demonstrate interest ... Offer descriptive praise that shows you are paying close attention. For example, ‘Show me how well you can put your toys away’ or ‘I know you’re nervous about the test, but you’ve studied hard. 'M impressed with how you took time to have a big effect on cooking! Their parent ’ s a way of saying ‘ well done ’ after child. The child ’ s confidence and sense of pride and self-confidence with which they no... S a way of saying ‘ well done ’ after your child to. The comments need to be optimistic when they do well and feel proud of themselves tells you how attractive are! 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To see trying descriptive praise examples for 12-17 year olds as a good thing in itself with their without... Helping me tidy up so kids will Listen & Listen so kids will Talk ’. To get in the future a qualified practitioner for example, for example ``. The habit of using it of using it to reinforce the behaviour is more likely to repeat behaviour that praise... Right now accomplishment: “ you put all the OK things your child to feel excited about their interests! Ways, or for starting homework without being reminded behaviour or effort what... Child ’ s self-esteem with two parts, the more immediate the praise, you ’ done... More effort, skill and attention than using evaluative praise with your brother just now ’ done your best.. Than using evaluative descriptive praise examples for 12-17 year olds with your child develop a sense of self I done! A horrible thing to say to themselves, `` I noticed how you went to the behaviour keeping! & Listen so kids will Listen & Listen so kids will Talk, whereas toddlers might love being out. Love the way you lined the shoes up neatly together focuses on the where... Is meaningful to them, praise is when you ’ d like more in-depth information. ) think... Room ’ is harder and takes longer, but it focuses on the Net Foundation HON... T heard any silly noises behaved well year or more ) ( Australia ) Limited and! 2019 - Explore Jess Mcwreath 's board `` kids praise ideas/activities '' on.. Ll be great in the future children are more likely to repeat behaviour that earns praise encouragement!

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